After overcoming your biggest obstacle of coming out and being accepted by your family, life has gotten easier. It got even better when you met the love of your life. Things are getting quite serious between you two. Both of you have become familiar with each other’s schedules, likes, dislikes, and so on.
Your friends love her, and her friends welcomed you openly with wide arms. Life is going pretty well.
Since she has become an important person in your life, it is innate to introduce your favorite person to your family. Your family can be quite overwhelming and weird, but they love you nevertheless.
You also want your significant other to be a part of this family, so you invite her to your annual family dinner this Christmas.
This is a special milestone and can be quite daunting. Take a deep breath and calm your nerves -you got this! You just need to consider a few things and keep them in check. This article will discuss various tips for bringing your girlfriend home this Christmas.
Give Your Parents and Siblings a Heads Up
If you have already started to fantasize about your gay wedding, you need to play your cards right to make it a reality. As your relationship is getting stronger and more serious, it soon becomes a necessity to introduce the apple of your eye to your family.
Before bringing her to the family Christmas dinner, give your parents a heads up, especially so if they are the hosts of the dinner. You do not want to throw your family off. They might even have that homophobic relative over for dinner, and it can be quite catastrophic if none of them are mentally prepared for this meeting.
Hence, to minimize the risk of things going south, let your mom and dad know you are bringing a special someone, and they should be cordial accordingly.
If you are having dinner at your sibling’s place, let them and their significant others know beforehand. Basically, let the host know that you are bringing your significant other and are excited for everyone to finally meet her. The host will make the necessary preparations accordingly.
Give Your Girlfriend a Short Briefing
You are elated that your girlfriend is on board with meeting your family. She is also quite nervous. It is best if you give her a short walkthrough of your family tree. Simply show her the pictures of your immediate family members so that she can have an idea of what they are like.
Show her the last family picture taken, let her know who your parents are. Recognizing your parents is crucial and can be very handy. You can also show the recent pictures shared on their social media. Do not overwhelm her with the various cousins, uncles, aunts you have.
She will jumble it all up. Just give her a run-down on your parents and siblings. You can also give her a brief regarding your grandparents if you want, but no need to add more relatives she could know about. Keep it short and simple, and it will be easier for her to remember and keep track.
Give Her a Run Down Family Christmas Traditions
Giving your girlfriend a rundown of your family Christmas traditions will reduce the likelihood of your better half being left out or being caught like a deer in headlights. This is especially true if they are unique and different.
It can be traditional, like singing carols together, or it can be something crazy like playing the grown-up version of the “The Floor is Lava” game. She will be more comfortable and prepared when she has an inkling of what she is about to step into. Also, give her a heads up of the competitive family members, that way, she will know how to beat them or stay out of their way.
If the tradition involves physical activity like playing soccer or baseball, it is mandatory to give her a heads up. She will bring the necessary sportswear and seize the day. It will also help her be alert and mentally prepared if she is someone who does not like the strenuous exercise that goes behind any outdoor sport.
Let the Host Know About Any Diet Restrictions
It is wise to let the host know what your girlfriend can or can’t eat. The last thing you want is to take your significant other to the emergency room as a result of food allergies. It is also best to let them know about her dietary choices.
For instance, if your girlfriend is vegan, request the host nicely to have one or two vegan items for her or just let them know that your guest is a vegan. No matter how traditional it is, there are always simple vegan Christmas dishes available.
If it is a potluck dinner, then both of you can bring something vegan; this also solves the issue without having an awkward conversation with the host.
Common Interests
You can talk with your girl about her interests, and there will be some subjects or opinions that are shared by both your s.o and a family member. For instance, your sister loves Harry Potter, and your girlfriend is also a die-hard fan. They can have various discussions and bond over their common fondness of the epic series.
Or your brother loves this hip new restaurant where the pasta is to die for, and it turns out your better half also loves their food. It can be any topic where both a family member and your significant other have a shared interest. It can be as mundane as a preferred choice of barbecue, or it can be something interesting like having an avid interest in football.
This is a great way to find common ground and keep the conversation going. A stimulating conversation is a key to forming new relationships and healthy communications.
What Topics to Not Bring Up
You need to tell both your family and your girlfriend about some topics to avoid at all costs. Such sore topics can bring out the differences and can ruin the entire day. Religion and politics should be avoided by both parties. These two topics are a slippery slope to disagreements and resentment towards one another.
If your girlfriend is trans, inform your family not to raise any topics regarding her body, no matter how curious they are. They can ask you about it in private, or after being close enough to her, they can ask her anything they want to know about being trans. They have to be respectful. Since it is the first meeting, it is best to keep their curiosity under wraps till they become really close.
There are also other sensitive topics in families like education and addiction. It is best to let your girlfriend know about it and advise her not to bring them up in conversations.
Hint Your Parents of Acceptable Introductions
It might take some time for them to become less awkward when stating their daughter has a girlfriend. Sometimes the parents do not know what exactly to say when introducing your better half to other members of the family. They might find it a hassle and do not know how to deal with it.
Just let them know not to introduce your lady love as a “special friend.” They can introduce her as their daughter’s special someone, girlfriend, significant other, and better half. Tell them to practice it in front of the mirror if they have to.
Limit Your PDA
Regardless of sexual orientation, everyone can feel uncomfortable when there is intense PDA, especially in family-friendly places. Holding your lover’s hand and a peck on the lips or cheek is fine. Just do not make out and be all over each other. Your girlfriend looks amazing and irresistible; just pounce on her in the privacy of your bedroom.
Get Your Girlfriend to Bring a Gift
As a first introduction, it is essential to make a good impression. Hence, like a commendable guest, it is wise to inform your better half to bear a gift for the family. It does not necessarily have to be extravagant.
It can be a nice bottle of wine, a tin filled with homemade cookies, an elegant box of chocolates, or a bouquet of your mom’s favorite flowers. This nice token will surely be appreciated by the family and establish a great first impression.
Plan B: an Escape Plan
Some family members can bring out the worst of us. Some may make hurtful remarks or backhanded compliments unknowingly. It is sometimes not possible for everything to go according to plan. If your family is getting too crazy, they might scare off your new love interest. No one wants their significant other to bear certain brunts.
Surely she can be an absolute champ, but there is no need to get overwhelmed. If you sense something unsavory will happen or things are getting out of hand, go for plan B. Make an escape plan beforehand just so you and your girl can avoid any unpleasant encounters when things start to go south. Formulate a legit excuse and be believable.
It can be a sudden öffice meeting” or something work-related you forgot about. Or it can be forgetting about leaving behind food for your pet, or there has been an emergency in your house, and your roommate has been calling you.
Final Words
It is an exciting journey when you find the one, and you have a feeling that it is a love that will last forever. Hence, introducing your girlfriend to your family can establish that you are all in and you mean serious business. Just remember that communication is key and give both parties the necessary heads-up.
