Follow that bliss aka do this, not that

Five minute zenBY MIKI MARKOVICH
Lesbian.com

It can be easy to get caught up in the great hamster wheel: Wake up, pour coffee, fluff hair, work, eat, visit, take out trash, shower, sleep, repeat. Of course, there are other items tossed in there, some fun, others obligations. They can all have their place of honor, if you’re choosing authentically, consciously and with heart.

To experience zen, you need to be true to you to your core.

I’d like to invite you to try an experiment with me just for the next week or so to see how you like it. The first step is to choose a couple of traits or emotions you’d like to exude or to experience more often. I want you to really think about this. Determine for yourself what you WANT to feel. If you don’t choose, others may try to do the choosing for you. Don’t believe me? Here’s an example.

Some may have a deep-seated need to choose selflessness due to societal pressures for women to put others first. If feeling selfless and giving is what you desire, more power to you. However, if you long to be effervescent and the center of attention, you may find that when you feel good about yourself by acting in an authentic way, you’re actually evoking more positive change in the world, and in turn are more giving.

A few chosen descriptors on my radar right now include fulfilled, creative, rested and sexy.

Let’s start with sexy. Like many, when I was younger, I struggled with an eating disorder. Although I kicked the body-abusing behaviors decades ago, I still have plenty of moments when looking in the mirror is difficult and even painful for me. The day before I was leaving on my recent 6,000-mile road trip, I was shopping for some last minute items. With everything in hand, I was making my way out of the shopping center when I saw a pedicure sign. I love having painted toenails, but I hate all the cutting, filing, buffing, painting, coating, etc. that come with it. Having only had a professional pedicure once, I knew I liked them, but felt spending $30 having someone do something I could do myself was wasteful. Then I reminded myself of those core desires I decided to actively work on. I ended up visiting with some amazing women, got a great chair massage, saw nails healthier and more shapely than I had seen in a while and felt nothing less than glamorous.

Could I have skipped because of the money, the hairy legs, the wrong shoes on my feet? Of course. But I felt prettier and sexier than I had in a long time. And I rocked open-toed sandals the entire trip. Since then, I’ve done a few other things; such as, investing in a fun-colored strapless bra and downloaded “The Femme’s Guide to the Universe” by Shar Rednour. Now, she’s a saucy one. I may not use all of her tips, but I can tell you, I’m definitely down for ordering an extra dry, extra dirty vodka martini in her recommended pose next time I’m out. I’ll let you know how it goes.

OK. Your turn. Be open. Be creative. Search your soul and choose carefully or choose whimsically to try on a few new traits to see what you think. Then comes the easy part: Let your chosen emotions guide your decision making. Be conscious, be courageous, be true. You, my dear one, are a ray of sunshine. It’s time to shine.

Have a tip? I’d love to hear it.

Miki Markovich is a seeker of beauty and truth, traveler of interesting roads, saver of furry souls, typer of words, iPhone lover and mac head. You can find her on Twitter at @mikimarkovich and @fiveminutezen. If you’re looking to go from pissed to blissed in five minutes flat, find balance or improve the quality of your life through self care, check out her website at fiveminutezen.com.

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