The urge to merge: The psychology of U-Hauling

U-Haul truckBY CHLOË
AfterEllen

“U-hauling happens for two reasons,” Dr. Lauren Costine, a Clinical Psychologist based in Beverly Hills who is pioneering programming devoted to lesbian minds, explains. “Biologically our brains are wired for a relationships and connection. We emit much more Oxytocin than men. Oxytocin is a hormone women emit  when they’re falling in love, having sex, or breastfeeding. It’s biological encouragement to attach. It feels so good that for some women, in this case lesbians, they can’t get enough. Since there’s two women, there’s twice as much Oxytocin floating around… The second reason U-Hauling happens is society. We live in a society that tells all women being in a relationship is one of the, if not the most important life goal. Combine those two factors with low self-esteem caused by internalized lesbianphobia, and you’ve got the U-haul recipe. When that person starts getting love from another woman, it temporarily fills that low self-esteem. All the red flags are dismissed, ignored, or simply not thought out.”

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